Get Out of the Kitchen and Socialize During the Holidays!

I enjoyed (more like survived) another holiday! For all those designated cooks you may know exactly what I mean. Were you missing an ingredient when you were ready to start cooking? Did you forget to serve something you had planned? Or there is that often asked question. "How do I time my dishes to have everything ready to serve at once?" Hopefully my four steps will reduce your stress and gain you time to socialize.

# 1 Don't procrastinate!!!

# 2 Plan
Think about all the family functions and parties you will be attending over the holiday, write it down either on a calendar, datebook, or a post a visible note. Include start time, location, departure time and directions if needed. If you are hosting, plan your menus! Make sure to include items that can be made ahead and limit items that need to be made last minute.

# 3 Make a List
I know some people can go through life without the need of a list, but for others it is the only saving grace from total disaster. Make a grocery shopping list made from menu items and recipes you plan to use. Consider making a list for each function include: all the food items, serving utensils, and any miscellaneous items you plan to take.

# 4 Prepare Ahead
Once menus are planned review and add preparation/cooking times. Make items that can be prepared ahead. Many casseroles can be prepared a week or more ahead then frozen. Several days before the function make a time line of preparation/baking times for all menu items. This will help reduce stress and make sure nothing is forgotten and everything is done when dinner is scheduled to be served.

Having family members help with holiday preparations is also an effective way to save time in the kitchen. If you have found some sure fire ways to save time in the kitchen please comment and share your secrets. So we all can enjoy the holidays with less stress and more free time to visit with friends and family. ENJOY!!

Mindless Eating Over the Holidays

The last thing that anyone wants to be reminded of two days before Thanksgiving is that they should watch how much they eat. However, Thanksgiving kicks off a month of holiday events that usually involve (great!!) food. I participated in a webinar last week that included a presentation by Dr. Brian Wansink, Professor of Marketing and Nutritional Science at Cornell University and author of Mindless Eating – Why We Eat More Than We Think. Included in his book were some studies he had conducted with his students and colleagues that I found very interesting.

In one study, he invited students to a Superbowl event in two rooms, one where the popcorn was served in 1) three 4 liter bowls and 2) six 2-liter bowls. His results showed that 45% more popcorn was eaten from the room with the larger bowls. Some of the popcorn in larger bowls was even stale and in this room, participants still ate 34% more than the smaller bowlroom. Consequent studies with children showed that eating from larger cereal bowls encouraged them to eat larger portions. Did you know that plates have increased in size 30% since 1960? Could this be one reason why we eat more? Is the clean plate club encouraging greater portions?

How many of you have a copy of Joy of Cooking on your recipe shelf? Wansink and Payne, (2009) looked at the 8 editions that have been published from 1937 – 2006. All but one comparable recipe in all editions had increased in calories or serving size. Should we be cooking from our great grandmother’s cookbooks?

His most recent study (Wansink and Smith, 2010) looked at calorie trends for classic Thanksgiving Recipes 1900 to 2000. Good news! Because the Thanksgiving dinner classics haven’t changed much over the years, the calories/ounce are very similar over the century. However,are our serving sizes the same? Do we share the food with the same size families?

And finally, Wansink mentioned that people eat more when expectations are high – which is true for most holiday meals. Even mediocre tasting food is consumed with gusto when Grandma is known to be a good cook or restaurants title their entrees with savory descriptions. Good company can also extend the eating period into second, third and fourth servings.

This article’s purpose is not to dampen the wonderful holiday this week. However, after you stuff yourself with all the turkey and trimmings on Thursday, don’t be a mindless eater in the month to come. Most of us have a lot to thankful for but obesity isn't one of them. Enjoy the holiday season!

Supporting Autonomy in Children

Have you ever had to fight the urge to do your child’s homework or complete a project for him? Did you ever rush to end a disagreement your child was having with a friend? How many times have you made decisions for your child because you feared her choices were not as good as yours?

Animals have a biological instinct that drives them to protect their offspring. Doing so preserves the species. As human beings then, we are already predestined to work to keep our children out of harm’s way. But humans not only protect physically as do the member of the animal kingdom. To one degree or another we also try to shield our young from emotional, social, and psychological pain. And this is what creates a struggle for parents when it comes to creating a balance between controlling our kids and supporting them in their own endeavors.

According to researchers Wendy Grolnick and Nicholas Apostoleris of Clark University parents experience three pressures that drive them toward exerting control over their children: pressure from within, pressure from below, and pressure from outside.

Sometimes as parents we feel compelled to control our children when we feel our own reputations or self-images are at stake. This internal pressure causes us to push our children to be successful. Other times, our own kids push us to being controlling. A child who is challenging often creates within the family a vicious cycle of non-compliance/control/more non-compliance/more control. Finally, external pressures on parents include the stresses and adversities experienced by families. When people feel they have little or no control over things in their life such as economic conditions they often exert an inordinate amount of control over the things they feel they can control such as other people, namely their children. Also, stress causes more irritability. As a result, there is less mental energy left to negotiate with children, and supporting autonomy can be quite taxing.

Before you grab that project or begin drilling your child, stop and ask yourself what is your motivation for wanting to do so? Is it because you don’t want your child to experience failure or embarrassment? Do you worry about what other parents or teachers will think of you based on your child’s performance? Are you fearful of losing any control at all over your child? Consider the costs and benefits of getting too involved.

Supporting autonomy includes strategies like encouraging children to solve their own problems, seeing things from the child’s point of view, asking them how you can help, and assisting children to explore possible outcomes of choices. Supportive parents limit the use of controlling behaviors to issues that are truly harmful or against the grain of the values upheld by the family.

Need a Fraud Alert on Your Credit Report?

You’ve probably heard stories about a company’s records being compromised and Social Security numbers, credit card numbers or other personal data being stolen. If your information was among the stolen data, what would you do?

Well, after you’ve finished fussing and fuming about how it could have happened, there are options available to preclude or minimize any possible damage.

Placing a Fraud Alert

You could place a fraud alert. A fraud alert can help prevent the identity thief from opening an account in your name. There are two primary types of fraud alerts to consider.

An initial fraud alert stays on your credit report for at least 90 days. During that time, creditors must use “reasonable policies and procedures” to verify your identity before issuing credit in your name. An initial fraud alert may be sufficient if you suspect that you have been, or may about to be, a victim of identity theft if your wallet or computer has been stolen or if you’ve been a victim of a phishing scam. The initial fraud alert also allows you to get a free copy of your credit report.

The second type, an extended fraud alert, stays on your credit report for seven years. If you’ve been a victim of identity theft you can ask for an extended alert. You will need to provide the consumer reporting company with an Identity Theft Report accompanied by a copy of a report you have filed with a federal, state, or local law enforcement agency. This type of alert requires potential creditors to meet with you or contact you before issuing you credit.

An extended alert entitles you to two free credit reports within twelve months from each of the three nationwide consumer reporting agencies. The consumer reporting companies will remove your name from marketing lists for pre-screened credit offers for up to five years or until you ask them to put your name back on the list if earlier.

If you are a member of the military and away from your usual duty station, you may place an active duty alert on your credit report to help minimize the risk of identity theft while you are deployed. When a business sees the alert on your credit report, it must verify your identity before issuing you credit. The business may try to contact you directly, but if you're on deployment, that may be impossible. As a result, the law allows you to use a personal representative to place or remove an alert. Active duty alerts on your report are effective for one year, unless you request that the alert be removed sooner. If your deployment lasts longer, you may place another alert on your report.

Whichever type of alert you place or remove, you will be required to provide appropriate proof of your identity such as your Social Security number, name address, and other personal information.

You can place a fraud alert by contacting one of the three credit reporting agencies. The agency you contact is required to contact the other two to place an alert on their version of your report.

• Equifax: 1-877-576-5734; http://www.alerts.equifax.com/
• Experian: 1-888-397-3742; www.experian.com/fraud
• TransUnion: 1-800-680-7289; http://www.transunion.com/

Placing a Credit Security Freeze

A more restrictive option is a credit security freeze. Most states have laws allowing the consumer to freeze their credit. A freeze restricts access to the credit report. Potential creditors won’t be able to access your report unless you temporarily thaw the freeze using a PIN so legitimate applications can be processed.

The charges for placing a security freeze on your credit vary by state. There may be a fee to place the security freeze, to temporarily lift it, or to remove it. Pennsylvania has set a maximum fee of $10 to place or temporarily lift the freeze and it is waived for victims of identity theft. Persons 65 years of age or older are also exempted from the fee to place a freeze. There is no cost to remove the freeze in Pennsylvania. The three credit reporting agencies (Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion) or your state’s Attorney General’s office can provide information pertaining to your state.

If you wish to open a new account while your files are frozen, you can lift the security freeze for a temporary period of time or with a specific creditor.

Unauthorized Credit Card Use

The above options all relate to the opening of a new account. None will stop someone who has obtained your credit card number from going shopping. If that is the case, contact the issuing bank or credit union immediately. Your monthly statement will have the toll-free phone number. Follow up with a letter including your account number, when you noticed the card was missing, and the date you first reported the loss.

The maximum liability for unauthorized use of your credit card is $50 per card if reported within 60 days. If reported before the card is used, you are not responsible for any charges. If the card was not stolen or lost, but the number was used, you have no liability for unauthorized use. Always review your billing statements carefully and watch for any questionable charges.

For additional information on placing a fraud alert or credit freeze, go to:
Federal Trade Commission at http://www.ftc.gov/
Pennsylvania Attorney General at http://www.attorneygeneral.gov/
Consumers Union at http://www.consumersunion.org/campaigns/financialprivacynow/learn.html
Bankrate .com at http://www.bankrate.com/brm/news/cc/20060911b1.asp

Slowing Down the Holidays

Holiday decorations are already filling the stores and many parents feel their blood pressure rise with just the thought of the stresses and expectations that the “joyous” season brings. This year try to take a step back and think about what memories you are creating for your children. Will they recall Thanksgiving and other holidays as a warm fun time surrounded by family, friends or neighbors? Or will their recollection be a horror story of how mom or dad “exploded” when the turkey burned?

Think about your own childhood holiday memories. Is it the perfect place settings or the number of casseroles that you recall? More likely it was the games you played with cousins or the hike the family took after dinner or some other simple pleasure that comes to mind. Maybe you can recreate these fun times for your kids and focus a little less on achieving perfection with your dinner or decorations. You might find that you are all a little happier as a result.

Think of ways you can involve your children in the preparations for the holidays. Can they make place cards for everyone, create table decorations, and help make the pumpkin pie or set the table? Perfection is not necessary – keep in mind the pride they will have when they tell others that they helped. The same is true if you are expecting a crowd for the holidays – leave them some tasks to do so they feel part of the event. I have used a “job jar” before and let my family members draw slips of paper that assigned them responsibilities for Thanksgiving dinner. The suspense of the “luck of the draw” made it fun for everyone. What creative ideas have you used to de-stress the holiday season?